Monday, February 21, 2005

Developing friends

Salvatore About Books: Review A Business Classic

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

by Colombo DiSalvatore

“I believe every individual who reads this book will benefit.” DiSalvatore

This was one of the first books I read when I began a business dealing with people. It is to this day one of the first books I recommend people read if they are interested in self improvement and developing people skills. Carnegie’s book uses examples of right and wrong responses in situations that involve relationships. I really related to the responses as I generally had used the wrong one. People want relationships in which they feel worthwhile. Sometimes it is better to let people think they are correct when the price of correcting them would be to sacrifice any relationship with them in the future. By opening the door to a relationship, one can share opinions and take the time to learn from one another.

The example of gently offering alternative answers used in this book, is similar to the feel, felt, found principle. I know how you feel, I felt the same way, but let me tell you what I found out……By using these words, one can offer a different or correct answer without embarrassing the individual you are talking with. I have used this many times over the years and have found it to be effective in addressing misconceptions or misunderstandings.

An individual, even a shy one, often feels comfortable talking about their favorite subject-themselves. Being a good listener goes a long way in developing friendships. When we show genuine interest in others and listen to them, they will leave thinking of us, what a nice couple! This is an easy exercise to do in exchange for developing friendships. It is quite enjoyable as well.

In developing friends, we develop contacts in our life that may help us in many areas. If your business requires expanding communities, people are our greatest asset and resource. Within a friendship, we may also become important in growing business concepts and ideas.

I believe every individual who reads this book will benefit.

Columnist: Columbo DiSalvatore : Colombo DiSalvatore